Reflections on my grandma

Last Saturday I attended the funeral of my last living grandparent, Louise Edwina Overly. As hard as it is to lose a grandparent, I am grateful that her suffering on earth is over and she is now able to be reunited with her husband, my grandfather, who we affectionately called “Papa Bob.”

Considering her age and the fact that she outlived almost everyone in her generation, I was surprised that so many people came to her funeral. There were at least fifty people, many of whom I had never met. My family, of course, had reserved seats—the first two pews at the front of the church. As I took my seat in between my husband, Ben, and cousin, Amber, I fixed my gaze on a beautiful portrait of my grandparents which had been placed just in front of the podium where the gospel is read. It was a picture of my grandparents in their sixties and it is how I remember them when I was a young child. My grandmother was still vibrant and healthy when that photograph was taken, not yet crippled, broken, and tired.
The funeral began with several of her favorite hymns, which she actually picked herself for her own funeral. We sang together, “The Old Rugged Cross,” and “How Great Thou Art.” I could see my cousin, Jeff, in the front row, become emotional. Jeff was my grandmother’s only grandson, and while she wouldn’t admit to having favorites, we all knew that Jeff was undoubtedly her favorite grandchild.
I held it together for most of the ceremony. That is until my mom came up to speak. My mother, dressed in a simple black dress, approached the podium. I could see her lip begin to quiver and her eyes grew hot and red with tears. It took her a few minutes, but she pulled it together and was able to share a few memories and expressions of gratitude to her mom and those who loved and cared for her in her final years. Her message was heartfelt and I could feel her pain. She stood almost right in front of me and when she looked down our eyes locked. A knowing look was shared between us. She was speaking as a daughter about her mother, and I? Well, I was her mother’s granddaughter, her daughter. And my heart hurt thinking of how painful it must be to lose a mother. I looked at my mom realizing how brief life is, and my heart began to break for her and for me too.
The following day as I reflected on the events of Saturday, October 29th, I began to wonder. To wonder if my mom had shared a similar experience with her mom twenty-one years earlier when my great-grandmother, Nanny, had died. I remember when my grandmother’s mother died. I was six years old. And now she was gone too. My own mother is fifty-eight, and while she is certainly not old, in twenty-one years she will be seventy-nine. Seventy-nine is old. And how old will I be? I’ll be forty-eight. And even though that sounds like lifetimes away from now, I know that one day I will remember my grandmother’s funeral and think. Wow, that really wasn’t that long ago, was it?

Honoring Grandma Overly. June 30, 1924-October 20, 2011

What an amazing life. My grandmother, Louise Overly, was born in the roaring 20s, grew up during the Great Depression. She lived through World War II, married and had two beautiful girls, my mom, Jan and her sister, Carol. She was married to my grandfather for 46 years, until his death in 1995 when I was twelve.

A family shot with Grandma (purple jacket) about 4 years ago. One of the last times she was healthy enough to travel and do something with the family.

In 1983, she became a grandmother to my cousin, Amber. Less than a year later, I was born, then in 1985, my cousin Katie came along. Finally, in 1990, a boy, Jefferson, was added to our family tree. Just a few months later in 1991, the last of the grandchildren, my sister, Bree, was born. And thus by 1991 she was the proud grandma of four girls and a single boy, the apple of his grandfather's eye. Twenty-six years after her first grandchild was born, she became a great-grandmother to her only great-grandchild, Aya. I wish she could have met my kids, but I know she'll be looking down on them from heaven.

In the time I got to spend with my grandma, which wasn't nearly as much time as I would have liked since she lived far away, she taught me to play Poker (and how to keep my poker face), and we played countless rounds of Old Maid. She always made her Shrimp Louis salad, just the way my sister liked it, and loved her munchies! She would tease my dad about eating too many snacks but then readily admit that she was a muncher herself.

In 2003, she took Katie and me to the Caribbean on a cruise to celebrate our graduation from high school. She was 79 years old at the time and was still spry and spunky! She and my grandpa, Papa Bob, traveled the world together, visiting Russia, Europe, South America, Africa, and all over North America. It was only when she turned 80 that she decided that she would stop traveling abroad, since her health had begun to decline.

She gave each of her grandkids a college fund to help us pay for college--what an enormous gift of generosity to receive from a grandparent. It has made all of our lives easier, especially in these trying economic times.

The past few years have been hard, but the last few months have been very hard, especially for my mom and her sister. Losing a grandmother is difficult, but I can't imagine losing a mom, and hope I don't have to for many years.

Last night I imagined my grandma being welcomed into God's kingdom by my grandfather, and I hope he was holding her hand from the moment she passed. This morning I got the call at school. She left this world around 10:30am. I'm still not sure I quite understand it myself. Death is a mysterious strange, thing. I know we shall be together again one day, but probably not for a very long time.

Grandma "Weese" (we couldn't pronounce Louise so we called her Grandma "Weese"), was my last living grandparent. The last time I lost a grandmother I was 3. Both my grandfathers died when I was in middle school. It's different losing someone as an adult. This is the first death in my family since I was 12. And it feels different. Somehow it's more sobering. More real. I don't have any more grandparents on this earth. It is a strange feeling, but I know it's a part of life that we all must endure. Right now I think of my family and how much I love them all, but especially I think of Grandma Weese.

Grandma, I love you. Thank you for everything you ever did for me. Thank you for giving me the greatest gift I could ever ask for. My mom.

My goals

I don't think I've written any goals in a while, partially because I know what I want in my head. But as I tell my students (I'm such a hypocrite), when you write your goals down, they become much more tangible. So what are my goals? I guess I need to figure out which ones are short term and which are long term because that does effect the way I will approach them. I think the problem is that I dwell on the long term goals which I have little control over at this point, but I still want to write them down. So here they are:

Long Term Goals:

1. Find a way to get rid of our condo. Possibilities?
a. Market goes up and we sell it (unlikely)
b. Re-fi and rent it till we can sell it.
c. Rent it and take a big hit every month till we can sell it.

2. Find a new place to live where Ben can get a good job after graduating from his Bio program.
a. NorCal? Yosemite area? It would be so cool if he could work for the National Park.
b. Colorado?
c. Oregon?

3. Save enough money so I can stay home with kids while they're little (before they go to school). I hate the idea of putting my kids in daycare and would love to be a stay at home mom till they start full-time school (around 1st grade). I don't think I'd want to be a full time stay at home mom forever but that would be such a special time with my little ones, I wouldn't want to miss it.

4. Write a book. Yes, this one is just for me. I've always wanted to be a writer. I just need to find my story.

5. Buy a house with a yard in a beautiful neighborhood (beautiful, not necessarily well-to-do).


Short Term Goals:

1. Find fun things to do that don't cost a lot of money while Ben's in school. I'm getting a little stir crazy sitting around the house all the time.

2. Find ways to enjoy the holidays. Ben's not big into the holidays the way I am, so I need to find a way to still make it fun for me because I love everything about them--the food, the smells, the decorations, the family get togethers.

3. Hobby. I probably need to find a hobby. I'd love to write but I'm facing serious writer's block...not sure what I want to write about. Hopefully some Muse will help inspire me soon.

4. Cheaper travel. I can't wait till my birthday because Ben promised me we'd go to Cambria this year. I love that that place. It's like medicine to me...soothes my soul and helps rejuvinate me. Especially if I'm going to teach summer school next year.

5. Organize/decorate our house. I'm tired of looking at piles of junk all the time. It'd be nice if our house looked better. Maybe I wouldn't mind living here so much then...not sure how to do it though since we have way too much stuff for our tiny place.


So what are your goals? I think mine are incredibly mundane. I should probably get some more exciting ones. I guess I'm just frustrated because at 22 when I bought my condo I thought I was doing something to help ensure an easier future for me and my future family. Instead, I've caused a living nightmare. I'll never see the tens of thousands of dollars I put into this place and hopefully I won't end up having to pay money to the bank to have someone take it off our shoulders. It makes me sad that the hard work I put into this has been for nothing. I know I need to get over it, but it just depresses me. I feel like I'm being punished for something I didn't do...but I suppose that's just being whine-y, and I need to get over it. One day it'll all work out. I just hope it's sooner than later.

Health Update

I went to the doctors on Thursday afternoon and took a blood test. Came back yesterday and both liver tests were abnormal. I knew something was wrong with me. The doctor called and said it's most likely a virus. I've never had a virus with symptoms like these. No sore throat, runny nose, or cold like symptoms. Just extreme fatigue, headaches, and general achey-ness.

It's keeping me from getting work done or anything else for that matter. I'm so ready to get out of LA. I'm not sure why I feel this way at this moment, but I really want to live in a beautiful place with our own house and yard. A place where we can take walks and hikes. I feel claustrophobic in this place. I'm ready for change.

Still a few years to go but I guess I'll keep that dream in my mind for now...too keep me going and hopefully help me feel better!

Feeling icky...

I can't put my finger on it...for the past few days I've been unbelievably tired, especially after I get home from work and when I just wake up in the morning. I get headaches at night and in the morning and loss of appetite in the morning due to some naseau.

No, I'm not preggo. I even double checked by taking a test yesterday just to make sure.

So what is it then? On Sunday, I got insanely light headed and sweaty during mass and had to eat immediately after leaving church. I felt like I was going to pass out.

None of my symptoms are horrid but the combination of them is kicking my butt. Teaching all day, cooking, and grading papers at night...I haven't even gone to the gym this week because my body feels like it needs to shut down. I guess I'll go to the doctor if it keeps up for a few more days, but I went once before for similar symptoms and they had no answers for me. They just said to eat regularly which I'm doing.

Have any of you had similar symptoms? If so, what did it turn out to be? I don't think I have the flu because I haven't actually thrown up or anything. Even know I feel a bit light headed and VERY tired, and it's only 7:00pm!

Okay, well...I'd appreciate any advice or ideas...thanks!

My readers

I'm not exactly sure who reads my blog on a regular basis and I realize I haven't posted much lately. This is partially because I am back to work, grading tons of papers, and attending to the chores of daily life. But I do enjoy blogging and even though there is no paper and pen which I've always sworn I prefer, it is fun to see pictures and easily click to my favorite blogs.

I personally, only read one blog religiously and that is dandelionpaperweight. This blog is written by Amy, who was a fellow English major at CSUN and now fellow English teacher. Even though we only really talk digitally, her blog makes me feel like I am her friend because I sense that I know her through the words she writes and the pictures she posts. I love hearing about her journey to motherhood, especially since she battled with infertility for nearly 2 years before getting pregnant. Her blog has showed me that just sharing one's daily thoughts, interests, and dreams can be VERY interesting.

If you're interested in checking out her blog visit:

So who are my readers? I know she reads my blog too since she posts comments regularly on my posts. I also know my Aunt Alicia reads. She too has a blog and although she rarely posts I love reading the entries about family and memory. I assume my dad and sister read this occassionally but to be honest I'm not sure. My mom doesn't really use the internet so I doubt she reads this.

My mother-in-law, Laurie, and sister-in-law, Melissa, and brother-in-law, Scott, read it which is cool to me since we live so far away. I feel like this allows me to share with them some of my thoughts, dreams, and most importantly just a little about myself and what Ben and I are up to on a weekly basis. We only get to see them a couple times a year so it's nice to know what everyone is up to on a more regular basis.

This weekend, for instance, we are finally getting some free time to have some fun. Last night we went for Indian food and then saw the movie, Moneyball. It was a pretty good movie and an interesting story, especially since it was true. I'd recommend it. Even though movies are way overpriced, there is something nice about going out and having a date night that sometimes you don't experience while sitting on the couch. May be it's just the fact that I get ready, dress nicely, and put on makeup? May be it's the anticipation that comes all day at work on a Friday knowing that you'll get to have some time for just you and your husband. Whatever it is, it's just nice to go out on a date now and then. Tonight we will be going on a double date with my friend Shannon and her boyfriend, Nick. We're going miniature golfing! :)

Okay, so back to the topic. My readers. I also see that Roxy, a friend, Jessie, Ben's cousin, and Travis, an old friend have subscribed. I'm not sure if they read often but I hope they also enjoy the posts. I know I never say anything too profound or even write about anything that exciting but sometimes it's more fun to relate to normal, every day life, because that's what most of us experience on a daily basis.

Oh and I forgot my biggest fan. Ben. Little did I know until about a month ago that he reads all my posts. It was pretty fun when he was out of town to get a comment on one of my posts I had written about him. Here's a fun pic of my husband when he was a kid!

Ben's video

Over the weekend, I helped Ben with a project for his Communications class. I play the grandma in the last act.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WWM5h3Nodk

Short Rib Dinner

Tonight I made short ribs from Trader Joe's for dinner. I didn't have a recipe so I just invented my own.

I heated a pan with butter and added some diced onion and apple slices. I then sprinkled the apples and onions with a little cinnamon. After sauteing them for a few minutes I added the mixture to a bowl and set it aside.

While the apples and onion were cooking, I was rubbing the short ribs with some seasonings given to me by my mother-in-law, Laurie. I rubbed both sides and then put them into the hot pan and cooked them on each side for 1.5 minutes each. I then topped them with the apple/onion mixture when they were done.

For sides, we had some rice, a salad (argula, blue cheese, and pear slices), and whole wheat toast.

I didn't take any pictures of the finished product but you can imagine it looked yummy ;)

I guess I'm starting to learn how to cook!

What would you do if you won the lotto?

This was a question posed to me earlier this week by one of my 8th grade students. At the time, I told them a couple obvoius things I would do but said I'd have to get back to them on that later. I suppose part of that reason is that if I won the lotto, I probably wouldn't teach full time. I think, however, that I am meant to teach, so I would probably find a way to teach in some capacity--part time, most likely, though.

So what would I want to do if I won the lotto? If money were no object? Here are some of the things I've thought of so far.

1. The first thing I would do is pay off my ridiculously unaffordable condo so that I could either keep it as a rental property or sell it in the future.

2. Next, I would probably buy real estate. With the market as low as it is now, it makes sense as the best investment of our time. I probably wouldn't buy my dream home yet, though, since Ben is still in school and we don't know where we want to end up yet. (and yes, I think Ben would still want to go to school).

3. The next thing I would do is pay off my parent's and Ben's parent's houses and purchase a home for both Ben's sister, free and clear so they don't have to worry about them. For my sister, give her the money to purchase a home later when she knew where she'd want to live.

4. The next thing I'd do is join Ben in his adventure back in school. I'd finish teaching the school year full time but then request to go part-time the following year (or possibly take a leave of absence while I'm in school). What would I go back to school for? Well, I never finished my MA in English so I might do that. Or, I might get an MFA in Creative Writing or a PhD in Education since I already have my MA in that. Which one would I do for pure enjoyment? The MFA in Creative Writing, most def. And I suppose if I were rolling in dough, why wouldn't I pick the one that was for pure enjoyment?

5. I would begin to seriously learn how to cook--with whatever ingredients I wanted! Now, when I cook, I'm so conscious of the $$ I'm spending that it really limits the fun things I can do. If I had an unlimited grocery budget, I'd pick the meals that looked the most delicious and splurge on whatever ingredients they needed! I know that sounds like something I should be able to do now, but sadly it isn't. When you're a kid, you take for granted how hard one has to work even to put food on the table.

6. I would have kids sooner. Not a lot sooner, maybe one or two years sooner than what we're planning. People I know, keep saying, oh you'll probably have kids in 2 years. Right now, we're thinking more like 3 or 4, especially since our life is so uncertain with Ben in school, changing careers, and not knowing when we'll be able to get rid of our condo. I do look forward to more stability in our future.

Us with our 2 nephews, Logan & Landon (our ring bearers), and my cousin's girls, Cadie & Claire (our flower girls)

7. I would hire a housekeeper. Yes, it's true, I hate cleaning. I mean, a little light housework now and then, but who likes scrubbing the shower? I NEVER get it to sparkle the way I want it too.

8. A whole new wardrobe. Yes, it's sad, but most of the clothes I wear on a daily basis are 3+ years old. I have bought myself about two things this whole year. Part of that, however, is due to the wedding. If you count my wedding dress then my clothing budget this year was wayyy higher than usual years!

9. Regular self-care stuff. What do I mean by that? Facials, manicures, pedicures, massages. I know, it's self-indulgent but I love that stuff and right now I can't afford any of it.

10. Books. Yes, this one should probably go above #8, 9...haha! In my dream home, I'd have a huge, beautiful library of books. I'd buy a few first editions of my favs.

11. Travel. This one should also go up higher on the list. I have already been very fortunate in my life to have gotten to travel a lot more than the average person. But there is still so much of the world left to discover. Ben and I always have the most fun when we travel together, so I would make travel a regular part of our lives.

Me in Switzerland (2005)

12. Travel for charity. I've always wanted to travel somewhere to do charity. Africa? India? South America? Asia?

13. Design. Right now, we have no style at our house. Everything is a total mishmash of junk. It'd be fun to have enough $$ to buy new furniture and come up with a style we'd both like (which, by the way, would probably be our biggest fight yet!).

14. Publish a novel. Well, I suppose this one isn't guaranteed no matter how much $$ you have, but at least I'd have the time and resources to put toward it. And if I got that MFA in Creative Writing, then may be I'd have more of a shot.

15. Buy a vacation home in Cambria. Yes, that's my home away from home. I'm not sure Ben "gets" it. I mean, he likes the place alright, but I think he likes other places a lot more. I guess I associate it with my childhood, but I also think it's one of the most beautiful little coastal towns in the world, and I've been to quite a few gorgeous beaches (the Riveria in France, the Mediteranean in Italy, coasts of Ireland, Hawaii, Bahamas, Mexico, etc). I think I like it because it's rocky and cool and near the forest. As much as I like tropical beaches, there's something homey about a rocky cliffed, foresty beach.

16. Christmas. I would go ALL OUT at Christmas. I'm not talking presents. I'm just talking decor and activities. I'd love to have a fun Christmas party with yummy food and beautiful decorations. Our place is too small for that right now, though. I could only comfortably fit maybe two other couples in our living room and our dining room table seats 4.

I imagine many fun Christmas' ahead at my parent's cabin--what a winter wonderland!

17. A tortoise haven. I have 5 baby tortoises who are getting bigger and they need room to roam! I'd have a landscaper make them a tortoise heaven on Earth!

My youngest tortoise, Freddie.


18. Dogs and Horses. My husband would love a dog and horses and horse property and the like. I'd like it too, but I know horses are a TON of work. I suppose with that much $$ though we could hire help? LOL...look at me sounding like a snob.

19. Volunteering. I'd love to volunteer with Pro-Life groups like the one I used to volunteer with (the PCC). I just don't have time right now to do much for them except help with their annual auction.

20. Try more things. Yes, right now, I'm a little bored because we can't afford to go out and just do "stuff" like we used to whether it be going horseback riding, trying a new restaurant, seeing a concert, etc. It would be so nice not to have to worry about $$ when it comes to your social life.

Riding horses with Ben (March 2010).


So those are my top 20 things. What would be some of yours?

10 years since 9/11

It's hard to believe it's already been 10 years. I still remember where I was when I found out. I was in the S building at Reseda High School, and it was my senior year. My dad and I had just arrived at school and Vicki Arnold told us to come in her class room where she told us about the World Trade Center. We turned on the TV and watched the devastation. I don't think it really hit me that morning. I'm not sure it's ever fully hit me. I think 9/11 has unfolded itself to me over time as I hear the individual stories that have been told over the past ten years. Tonight I watched a two hour documentary in honor of the ten year anniversary, and it flooded me with memories of that day, but it also told me new stories of men and women who died who I had never heard of before.

I remember when I went to Germany, to Dachau's concentration camp, in the summer of 2005. I had been overwhelmed by the tragedy of the holocaust, but it was hard to make meaning of the loss. At Dachau, more than 33,000 people had died of malnutrition or flat out murder. What does 33,000 mean? It's hard to quantify the value of human life. Not without a face, a name, and a story.

But then a week later I was in Amsterdam visiting Anne Frank's house, looking at the board game which she described in her diary. The game she played with the young boy who also shared the attic with her and her family. And I was looking at this board game, thinking about how I read HER words when I was in 8th grade. That's when I "got" it. That's when the tears came. That's when I knew what the value of a single human life was. When I had a name, a face, a story, a memory. Anne Frank was a part of my own life when I read her diary many years ago.

And today, I found a single story to share with my students. A man named John Viggiano who lost both of his sons on 9/11. One of his sons was a fireman and the other a policeman. They both died trying to save other people. He spoke about his sons for a few minutes and I had the kids listen. My students are only 13. They were 3 when this tragedy happened, and I don't think they really "get it." But you know what? They "get" a father's love. They understand the pain in that man's voice when he described his last conversations with each of his sons.

So for John Viggiano and his family, I dedicate this post. Because I can't begin to comprehend the loss of 3,000 lives. But I can understand the loss of two.

So on Sunday, I know I will remember. I will remember standing in that hallway when I was 17 years old. I will remember watching the trade center collapse and I will remember moments over the past 10 years like when I saw United 93 in the movie theaters or when I saw an interview about a woman who talked about her husband who helped take that plane away from the hijackers. And I'll remember the Viggiano family. And I'll pray something like this never happens again even though I think we all know that as long as there is life on earth there will be evil and atrocity. I hope, however, that there will be more goodness and virtue to defeat the evil which we know will always be with us.

A great article about teachers and parents

http://www.cnn.com/2011/09/06/living/teachers-want-to-tell-parents/index.html

Our Wedding Video

For those of you who didn't make it to the wedding or who just couldn't see the video that well (due to the sun!), here it is! It only took 4 hours to upload...hehe. At least I could read, clean, exercise, etc, while it was loading!

Enjoy!

Reflecting on how good things are...

I am so happy. I am so in love with my husband and feel so grateful to have found him. This week was a bit of a struggle for us with him going back to school, but by the end of the week I realized how much of a team we are and how well we work together.

In the next few years we may not have much money to do fun things, to take fancy vacations, or save much money, but we have something so much more precious. We have each other. And together we are moving towards a goal that will give us and our future family options.

I am so proud of my husband for taking this risk to make his and our lives better. I pray that we can bless each other each day the way I feel so blessed right now. I know I am one lucky girl. When I hear about people I know, children I know, who are losing parents, who are sick, or who are dying themselves, I think about just how much I have to be grateful for. My parents and Ben's parents are healthy and happy. My sister, Bree, is doing well in college and just got a job after trying for nearly 4 months to find one! She and her boyfriend both actually just found jobs which is awesome because now they can work towards the hours they need to graduate. I have two nephews and two nieces who are SOO cute and many other family members who are an awesome support system.

I have a great job that allows me to grow as a person and as an educator, and my co-workers are great people who make it nice to come to work each day. This year I get to teach a class I've always wanted to teach but never have till now: Creative Writing. It's fun being able to teach at least one class where I get to design the curriculum.

What else am I grateful for? Well, this past summer was incredible. Between having my dream wedding and traveling all over the place all summer, I had so much fun!! Since turning 16, I have gotten to travel all over the world...Europe (England, Ireland, France, Italy, Austria, Germany, Holland, Austria, and Switzerland), the Caribbean, Alaska, Hawaii, Belize, the Grand Cayman Islands, Mexico, Canada, Massachusetts, Florida, Missouri, Illinois, Washington, the Bahamas, and Costa Rica.

What else? Well, I'm grateful for my education which has enabled me to get good teaching jobs.

Friends. I'm so grateful for my friends (including family members) and the people in my life who bring joy to me on a daily basis.

And I guess when it's all said and done, I'm so grateful to God for all of this but most especially for bringing Ben into my life. I prayed for years to meet him and I often amaze myself when I look down at my hand and see my wedding ring or when I wake up in his arms on a Saturday morning like I did today and I see him smiling up at me telling me how beautiful I am. Really, what could be better?

Thanks God for everything. And for all the difficult parts of our life, I just pray that you help us to focus on the positive and stay strong and work hard. I pray that I don't complain and that I am able to find joy in the smallest of pleasures.

I love how handsome my husband looks as he kisses my forehead. Ben, I love you.

What's up in our world?

Well, this week was stressful and Ben and I defintely need a date tonight. Thankfully, one of the wedding gifts my parents gave us was a gift certificate to Los Toros, so we will be heading over there for some margaritas tonight!


Last night, my dad and I went to Hollywood to meet a friend of my grandfather's (my dad's dad). My grandpa, "Popo," died when I was only 11 in 1995, but I still have fairly strong memories of him because we saw him so frequently when I was a child, especially during the several year period that he lived right around the corner from us.

About seven or eight years ago when I was in college I was taking a class on the history of the American West, and I decided to do a paper on the cowboys of Hollywood who became stuntmen known as the Gower Gulch men. The leading expert on these men is a woman named Diana Carey. She was "Baby Peggy" in the early 1920s (kind of like the Shirley Temple of westerns). Well, anyways, her father, Jack Montgomery (also known as "Poncho") was my grandfather's friend even though he was a lot older than my grandfather. Popo was acutally just a few years older than Diana (he was born in 1913 and she was born in 1918).

So I found Diana Carey online and emailed her explaining that I was the granddaughter of her old friend, Leo McMahon. She was delighted to speak with me, and I was amazed at how lucid this 80-some year old woman was. We have kept in touch through email (and now facebook) correspondance (yes, a 93 year old woman facebooks!), and yesterday she was in town for an event in Hollywood. My dad and I drove down to meet with her and had a lovely time discussing my grandfather.

It was like stepping out of time for a second. My dad's parents have been gone for so long. His mom died when I was three and it's been nearly 16 years since his father passed away. To see and speak a woman who is my grandfather's contemporary and friend amazed me because if my granfather was still alive he'd be 98 years old.

At the end of our conversation my dad presented Diana with a gift. Just before her father died in the 1970s, he had given my grandfather his lucky silver dollar that was so worn down you couldn't really see the impressions on it anymore. Just before my grandfather died in 1995, he passed that lucky silver dollar on to my dad. So my dad decided to give it back to the rightful owner, Jack Montgomery's daughter. We didn't know if she'd know what it was when he pulled it out, but this 93 year old woman's eyes grew wide and tearful and she exclaimed, "That's dad's lucky silver dollar!" She was so astonished and pleased that it warmed my heart to see my dad making this friend of my grandfather so happy. She hadn't seen that silver dollar since the 70s but she remembered it instantly.

I hope I have that kind of memory when I'm her age (if I make it that long). What an amazing thing to have lived through an entire century, to remember the Great Depression, WWII, and so many life changing moments in history. And she is one of the most self-reflective people I have ever met. I wish my grandparents could have been there with us last night. I miss them.

Btw, the photograph is of Diana Carey when she was playing "Baby Peggy" in the early 1920s.

First week with students

One week down and many more to go! Overall, my first week with students went well. I love my Creative Writing class--only 16 kids! So far my English classes have been going well too (even though those classes have anywhere from 29-33 kids each!). Can't complain too much though since public school teachers are dealing with 45 in a classroom, which is unbelievable.

I did have quite a sobering experience today, though. I can't give details on a blog, but there are some kids going through some very difficult things this year from their own health to their parents' health. One student in particular is going through something so difficult that I had a hard time keeping it together today after I heard about it. By the time the school day ended and I got in my car, I had held it in as long as I could. I cried all the way home and when I got home I cried again in Ben's arms. This wasn't even a case of me thinking how lucky I am or blessed I am. That's true but I can't even think about my own situation right now. I wish I could just change these kids circumstances and give them a better life. But I can't.

So I realized the only thing I do have power over is the fact that I am in their life and possibly for a reason. In the case of one child, I hope that he will feel safe, loved, and comfortable in my classroom. And while I hope this for all of my students, I pray with all my heart that if I fail at everything else this year, that I won't fail to love this child the way he needs to be loved.

Please pray for me to be a minister of love for all of my students this year. Please pray for me to know what to do and say to children who go through difficult times. Thank you.

Dinner at the Medley's

While I am far from a good cook, I have been trying to learn! About once a week I try to cook something...I mean really cook (not heat, boil, microwave, etc...lol). I suppose I'm inspired by other bloggers (dandelionpaperweight for one) who seem to always find time to make delicious (and healthy!) meals.

I am a good baker...I'll say that with some confidence, but cooking still takes effort for me, mostly because I find it difficult to shop for reasonable prices. Sometimes I'll look up a recipe and realize that all the ingredients would cost a fortune so I don't even bother. I remember one time I go the ingredients for what I thought was a fairly simple meal and it cost me around $40! I figure for that price I might as well go out to a nice restaurant and let someone else do the work.

For Ben's birthday this year I cooked something I never had before--a shepherd's pie! It was very reasonably priced to make (about $10 for both of us but that's partially because I already had some of the ingredients).

Tonight dinner consists of stuffed pork chops (apple stuffing), artichokes, and chicken/mushroom rice (that did come from a rice-a-roni box...lol). For desert we have peanut butter chocolate chip cookies. Mmmm...don't you wish you were @ our house tonight ;) LOL. I say this partly because Ben and I went to Roy's last night (we had a giftcard for $50). We had a mediocre dinner and still had to kick in $30! Ridiculous! I'm done with overpriced restaurants when I can make a good meal for $10-15 for TWO people! Okay, maybe every once in a while I'll go to some of my favorite restaurants (Maggiano's, Los Toros, Versailles) for a treat, but otherwise, I plan on learning more about this whole domestic thing. Enjoy this pix of our dinner!

Just the two of us (more wedding photos)

Well, it's back to wedding picture posts. It's hard to post all of them (and trust me, I won't) with over 600 photos and so many of them so good! Here are some of my favorites of Ben and me.

I love the look of this shot...so glamorous :)

So many romantic spots at the Hidden Chateau

Love how cute Ben looks here!

such a cool shot!

1st dance!

so neat that she caught this moment!

one of my favs!

Another amazing shot! One day I want to learn how to take photographs like this! :)